Relic

Relic 
by Douglas Preston and Lincoln Child


Blurb:

Just days before a massive exhibition opens at the popular New York Museum of Natural History, visitors are being savagely murdered in the museum's dark hallways and secret rooms. Autopsies indicate that the killer cannot be human...

But the museum's directors plan to go ahead with a big bash to celebrate the new exhibition, in spite of the murders.

Museum researcher Margo Green must find out who-- or what-- is doing the killing. But can she do it in time to stop the massacre?

My Reaction:This isn't my usual fare, but on the whole, I enjoyed it.  (I'd give it 3.5 stars.)  The museum made for a fascinating and atmospheric setting, and I found the main characters interesting and sympathetic enough that I cared what happened to at least a few of them.

The references to 1990's technology brought back memories from my youth... In many ways, modern tech is of course wonderful, but I do feel some nostalgia for the good old days-- especially the time before smart phones!

Without giving away too much, I wasn't really surprised by the twist, since it had occurred to me as one possibility earlier in the novel-- still interesting reading, though.

Ultimately, I'm not sure whether I'll read more in this series or not.  It was a reasonably enjoyable but oftentimes slow read for me, until the action finally kicked in and the story flowed more easily.  Psuedo-scientific thrillers are a little outside what I generally like to read, but I might give the next one a try, at some point.  I took a sneak peek at some plot points from later on in the series, and I have to say, it sounds a little crazy, but maybe...

The Mister

The Mister
by E.L. James


Blurb:

London, 2019. Life has been easy for Maxim Trevelyan. With his good looks, aristocratic connections, and money, he’s never had to work and he’s rarely slept alone. But all that changes when tragedy strikes and Maxim inherits his family’s noble title, wealth, and estates, and all the responsibility that entails. It’s a role he’s not prepared for and one that he struggles to face.

But his biggest challenge is fighting his desire for an unexpected, enigmatic young woman who’s recently arrived in England, possessing little more than a dangerous and troublesome past. Reticent, beautiful, and musically gifted, she’s an alluring mystery, and Maxim’s longing for her deepens into a passion that he’s never experienced and dares not name. Just who is Alessia Demachi? Can Maxim protect her from the malevolence that threatens her? And what will she do when she learns that he’s been hiding secrets of his own?

From the heart of London through wild, rural Cornwall to the bleak, forbidding beauty of the Balkans, The Mister is a roller-coaster ride of danger and desire that leaves the reader breathless to the very last page.

My Reaction:
Let me waste no time in absolving myself of this book choice by pointing out that it was a 372 Pages podcast selection (and as such, a read-aloud shared read with Donald).  I have no problem with romance as a genre (though it can be difficult to find one that I truly enjoy, now that I'm so much pickier, as an adult), but this particular one is kind of embarrassing...

It's just not good, in so many ways.

I can't be bothered to think up a cohesive, thoughtful review for this one-- or even the thrown-together, not especially cohesive type of review that I usually end up posting.

The characters are stupid, uninteresting, and unrealistic.  The plot is an odd mixture of the predictable and the bizarre.  The sex scenes are cringe-inducing and mind-numbingly repetitive.  (I think I probably sighed and rolled my eyes every time it became obvious that we were in for yet another of the "romance" scenes.  They were awful, and reading them aloud made them a hundred times worse!  I quickly made the executive decision to just skim through them and only read aloud any particularly hilarious tidbits that leaped off the page.)

There is very little going for this book.  ...Unless you happen to be reading it explicitly for the purpose of finding the humor in it, which is what 372 Pages boils down to.

Reading this "as a joke" made it so much more enjoyable than it would've been, read seriously.
It's still not a good book, though.

DNF: Bob Honey Who Just Do Stuff

Bob Honey Who Just Do Stuff
by Sean Penn


Blurb:

Bob Honey—a modern American man, entrepreneur, and part-time assassin. He’s just a guy trying to make it through each day while grappling with loneliness, alienation, violence—uncertain of his place in a culture that considers branding more important than being.

Bob Honey has a hard time connecting with other people. He dreams he is sleeping with his ex-wife every night, and imagines waking up unhappy next to her every morning. Advertising, entertainment, and commerce rule his days; he’s sick of being marketed to every moment, but is unable to pry himself away from the constant feed. A paragon of American entrepreneurialism, Bob sells septic tanks to Jehovah’s Witnesses and arranges colorful pyrotechnic displays for foreign dictators. He’s also a part-time assassin for an off-the-books program run by the CIA that targets the elderly, the infirm, and others who drain this consumption-driven society of its resources.

When a nosy journalist starts asking questions, Bob can’t decide if it’s a chance to form some sort of new friendship or if it’s the beginning of the end for him. With treason on everyone’s lips, terrorism in everyone’s sights, and American political life racing to ever-lower standards, Bob decides it’s time to make a change. If he doesn’t get killed by his mysterious controllers or exposed in the rapacious media first.

My Reaction:
I can sum up my reaction to this book (and the audiobook version read by Penn himself, which is how I "read" it) in one single word: UGH.

Yeah, big surprise: I absolutely hated it.  I'd give it negative stars, were it possible.  If not for the 372 Pages podcast, I never would have been tempted to read this one, and even with that as an incentive, we didn't get very far.  (This was another shared read/listen with Donald.)  I don't remember how far we got before saying, "Eh... Let's just listen to the podcast episodes without reading the rest, okay?"  (For the record, that's the first time we've done that, and it does reduce the listening pleasure of the podcast when you haven't read the book.  In this instance, however, I think we still came out ahead by avoiding further exposure to Bob Honey.)

Imagine my surprise upon discovering that there's a sequel in the works! 
Nope, not for me.